A Nagging Wife

August 26

Job 34-35

Psalm 97:1-5

Proverbs 21:9-10

Galatians 1

A Nagging Wife

“Better to live on the corner of a roof than to share a house with a nagging wife.”  Proverbs 21:9 HCSB

Ouch!  I think most of us need to be reminded of this verse periodically.  I try hard not to be a nagging wife.  I’m not sure why, but when I think of a nagging wife, the image of Gladys Kravitz from Bewitched comes to mind.  She was always nagging her husband and everyone else.  Her voice was so annoying like fingernails on a chalk board.  I DO NOT want to be like her!   But I am a list maker.  I get a strange pleasure out of checking things off my to-do list.  Unfortunately, that lends itself to nagging when the list is undone for longer than I want.  Brian hates it when I ask him to do something and then something else and one more thing.  After thirty-one years of marriage, we have a system.  He wants a list.  He does the things on the list but hates it when I keep adding to the list.  He would rather I just give him the full list to start.  This can be complicated when I remember something after I have made the list.  Since we moved into our new house, every weekend I have a to-do list for him, and he works the list without complaint unless I try to add to it and then he is not so compliant. 

I can’t tell you the number of times I have said to the girls that it is not so much what they say as how they say it that is the problem.  If you ask someone nicely and humbly to do something they are much more likely to do it than if you demand it.  Brian hates when I say, “I need you to…”  I’m not sure exactly what about this pushes his buttons, but I have learned that is not a good way to start a request to him.  If, however, I say, “could you please help me with…” he is always willing to help me in any way he can.  I think most of our husbands love us and want to help us but nagging and complaining never gets the result we want.  Pride leads to demanding our rights and expecting them to meet our expectations without considering their feelings and plans.  In biblical times, houses had flat roofs and so a man could escape his nagging wife by going up on the roof to be alone.  It was the biblical equivalent of a man cave.  I pray that my husband doesn’t have to escape to his man cave to get away from my nagging.