Quarrelsome or Prudent?

July 31

Ezra 7-8

Psalm 86:11-17

Proverbs 19:12-14

I Corinthians 9

Quarrelsome or Prudent?

“A foolish child is a father’s ruin and a quarrelsome wife is like the constant dripping of a leaky roof.  Houses and wealth are inherited from parents, but a prudent wife is from the Lord.”  Proverbs 19:13b-14 NIV

These verses describe two different types of homes.  One provides a life of joy and peace and the other makes life pure drudgery.  The first home has a child who is described as foolish.  Proverbs is filled with the contrast between the foolish person and the wise person.  We are not told why this child is foolish, just that his foolishness leads to his father’s ruin.  A fool will not listen to the advice of others thinking he is always right (Proverbs 1:7, 12:15, 18:2, 23:9).   A fool is rash and impetuous.  He does not consider the consequences of his actions, but follows his whims and desires (Proverbs 17:12, 14:15-16, 29:11).  A fool also scoffs at the things of God and makes light of sin (Psalm 14:1, Proverbs 1:7).  The father of the fool watches the destruction of his own life as a result of his child’s actions.  This can be from the sadness of watching the consequences of the poor choices of the foolish child, the financial devastation their decisions have made or the damage to their reputation because of their child’s foolishness.  Sometimes the father’s permissiveness, indulgence and lack of discipline results in a child who acts foolishly, but at other times wise, godly parents can have foolish children.  Unfortunately, we cannot completely control the actions of others.  They have free will to choose foolishness and the best we can do is pray for them and seek God’s wisdom about our interactions with them. 

The passage then talks about a quarrelsome wife.  This woman is unhappy and discontented and pours out her complaints to her husband like the drip, drip, drip of a leaky roof.  It is enough to drive him crazy and her unhappiness seeps into the whole house.  Nothing he does pleases her.  She creates tension and strife in the home instead of love and peace.  Solomon is speaking from personal experience.  He had many wives and he understood well the difficulties quarrelsome wives can cause. Solomon then goes on to explain that houses and wealth can be inherited and passed down from generation to generation but that does not ensure that the home will be filled with joy and peace.  Actually, comfort and ease can lead to entitlement and pride and these attitudes don’t usually create a peaceful home.  But a prudent wife, Solomon explains, is a gift from God.  She is wise and discerning in leading her family and she seeks God in all her ways.  Instead of being a nag, she is an encouragement to her husband and children.  She is content with the blessings God has given her and has a pleasant disposition.  What kind of home do you have?  Does it provide a life of joy and peace or drudgery for your family?  Ask God to reveal any areas where you can improve.